Some relationships are doomed right from the get-go. There’s simply not enough common ground on which to build even the most tentative of foundations. (see previous entry) Yet strangely enough, there are those people who want to try to buck the odds and “make it work.”
Seriously. There are people who think having little (or nothing) in common with your intended significant other is a good thing. They’re enamored with the old “opposites attract” propaganda. Maybe they think living with chaos and drama enhances their sex lives or something. Or maybe it’s all they’ve ever known.
Well, to quote a very good friend of mine, “If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got.”
Yep, I’m back on my “Clarity through Contrast” bandwagon. When you sit down and list what you don’t want in a relationship (by examining what didn’t work previously), you can then get clear on what you really do want. And clarity is a wonderful thing.
Basic attitudes, behaviors and beliefs which make you the unique person you are should align with those of your potential partner. Sounds simple enough. But a lot of people spend too much time trying to force a square peg into a round hole. It works for primitive furniture building, but never for long-term relationships. Take my word for it.
I’ve been around the block enough times to know that when something is right, you just know it. It doesn’t take much to “make it work” because it already works. When you’re clear about who you are and what you will and will not accept in your partner, the chaff and the grain just naturally sorts itself out.
Then you are free to experience all the joy, the delight, the incredible connection that multiplies in your relationship every day. When a relationship feels “right,” it’s like doing the “Happy Dance” 24/7. And that, my dear readers, is a very good place to start.