A little over a month ago, everything ganged up on me at once. I was rendered absolutely powerless by a debilitating and continuing low mood. Call it depression if you want. For over a week, I could hardly shower or dress, which meant I spent all my time just wallowing with some kind of funky grief-like symptoms
“They say” that the telephone is the 2,000-pound life preserver in situations such as this. That it takes a huge amount of effort to be able to lift the receiver and call for help. And in fact, I was unable to do that. I could not make myself reach out and admit I was drowning in deep-seated sorrow.
The causes were varied and many, and several are way too personal to get into here. Let’s just say that the waning light of winter compounded my dark thoughts. Although I knew I was a life-long victim of Seasonal Affective Disorder, I couldn’t dredge up a smile to save my soul. I was playing double-digit hours of computer solitaire, and mindlessly overeating, just waiting for time to pass. Time heals all… right?
Now the rule of thumb for a bad case of the blues is: two weeks rather normal, three weeks concern, four weeks seek some kind of professional help. But I didn’t want to wait to see if it would suddenly just go away. I got tired of being tired, of feeling powerless and having no rope, or hope, to hang onto.
So what’s a writer to do? Well, duh. How about writing about it? So I did, and then I got really brave and posted a shout-out for help on Facebook. I don’t know that I expected any response at all; it was just an item in the news feed without any kind of cute or clever picture to go with it, and probably wouldn’t attract much attention…
But the outpouring of suggestions and concern was just what I needed to get my butt moving again, albeit at a snail’s pace. But a snail’s pace is better than stagnation any day. Over 30 people commented on my post that night, offering a hand to hold and ideas to help me start shaking it off.
I made a list— (Of course I made a list! I’m a champion list maker!) And then I started looking to see which of these ideas I hadn’t already tried, and which might actually be of some inspiring usefulness. When put all together like that, this list became a brain trust of the highest quality.
Long story short, I’m feeling much better now, despite the dark days and family follies. My caffeine and comfort food consumption is back “under control,” I’m getting some exercise every day, and I’m taking the right natural supplements to mimic sunshine.
Life is once again, pretty darn good.