For starters, let me say I am definitely NOT one of those “fancy-schmancy” tourists who need to have room service (or even an on-site restaurant), baggage porters, turn-down service, or mints on the pillow. What I “need” is a place to set my suitcase, clean sheets, hot running water, and easy access to the town’s attractions. 
And in Mykonos… well, at least the sheets were clean!
I am actually surprised I took no “interior” photos of our room. Perhaps I was too busy shaking my head, wondering who, exactly, gave this place a 5-star rating, which is clearly posted on the side of the building where you enter the lobby.
Oops! Did I say “lobby?” … Take a look at that photo. Folding table notwithstanding, this was the poorest excuse for a hotel lobby ever, and much of the “registration” process had to be done by hand.
In our room, I had to unplug the TV and set it on the floor under the only available “shelf space” so I’d have somewhere to set my things. Poor Pat used her bed as a suitcase rack, and put everything away at night to be able to climb in to sleep.
The shower, inside the main room and not the bathroom, had a plexi-glass side and no shower curtain, so it was like bathing in a fishbowl. Our second morning there, there was no hot water anywhere in the hotel, no matter how long you 
waited, so those who showered had a definite “I’m AWAKE!” look when we went to breakfast, which was held in an outside, but covered, area. Outside was nice, but there were only 36 chairs for 46 people, so some of us perched upon the retaining wall, holding breakfast plates in their laps.
The main part of town was allegedly “7th tenths” of a kilometer from the hotel, but I walked, downhill all the way, for over 20 minutes to get there on a very well-traveled street, sans sidewalks, dodging rented mopeds and people who apparently didn’t know how to
use a brake pedal.
So… Was I an unhappy camper?… Well… SURPRISE!… Besides the fact that I DO NOT CAMP, I didn’t find this place all that objectionable. Yes, I had to sit outside the room to get any wifi connection at all, but sitting beneath the stars when it’s 72 degrees
and a light breeze is bringing the sea smells to you, isn’t what I would claim to be “combat duty.”
And during the day, being surrounded with the whitewashed buildings trimmed in vibrant blue, certainly reminded me that “I’m not in Kansas any more, Toto!” And for that, I gave thanks and counted my blessings and embraced what each day held.
What the hell! I was in GREECE!